From Trauma to Prana
Growing up in an alcoholic, codependent, and narcissistically abusive environment created within me my own codependent and narcissistically dysfunctional structures. People pleasing, a deep fear of disappointing others, and to some extent, non-empathetic ways of relating dominated my nervous system's survival strategies. Through my 20's, I spent years in therapy, tried psychiatric drugs, and made some significant progress but I found that these pernicious structures still creeped around in my subconscious—waiting for just the right situation to trigger their dominance over my self-control. And though I really can't sing enough praise for the therapies I've received, especially those of the psychedelic persuasion, only via Tantric Yoga—what Relationship Yoga is founded upon—did I find a reliable post-therapy approach to manage the trauma responses I've carried since those early years.
See, beneath all emotions, all beliefs, all behaviors there is simply an energy of consciousness. Informational energy. The energy of consciousness itself. What could be described non-mystically as felt-sense-experience (e.g., Annaka Harris). Not emotions, but feelings; though these energies can become emotions. An aspect of experience which is very subtle and thus often missed. But if you're practicing a Yoga which isn't limited to postures, you are quickly on your way—on a pilgrimage which leads you away from the default world of the course (gross) level of experience, down the progressive path toward more and more subtle-sense awareness. And if you can start relating to this subtle sense realm of energy—the truth-register if your relational reality—you can directly alter the flow of these traumatic imprints.
According to Yogic philosophy, we do postural Yoga to increase our body's capacity to draw in Prana, or subtle, vital energy. This ‘dials-up’ the energetic experience in the body; making the subtle more obvious. Our felt-sense experience becomes more available to our awareness. When it becomes more obvious, it becomes an object powerful enough to hold our attention. This draws the continual attention away from our discursive thoughts toward that which is prior to thought. This is a much more effective means of stilling the mind than 'trying' to still the mind directly. Presence becomes available and our thoughts eventually have less power over our experience. And when we can attend to our experience of energy in this way—when we can relate with it, a profound change happens.
A change that gives you almost absolute authority over your reactions, responses, your world of feelings as a whole. You will find that, by simply occupying the role of the loving observer of your 'felt-sense intelligent energy' of consciousness, awareness alone is curative. When you're aware of a pattern as the energy it is before it becomes a thought or behavior, it no longer can possess you. It can't gain enough strength to topple over and penetrate through your strength of observation and if you're observing it intently, it stands much less of a chance of dictating your behavior. It no longer spills out and into your relationship dynamics unconsciously.
When you can do this, you are taking responsibility for yourself in a very deep way, and doing so builds self-esteem as it builds your integrity with the truth of your relational reality. It gets you more self-honest, which encourages authenticity and vulnerability. Your interiority stops being such a mystery and starts becoming a more understood territory, which is an act of love in itself. But what's perhaps most amazing about this skill is that you gain agency over the fundamental building-blocks of your well-being. The levers that control the stuff of happiness appear in your hands...
This is at the foundation of relational mindfulness, which is at the foundation of Relationship Yoga. A course based on this subject will be available in about a month, which we are excited to release as soon as we can.
So keep practicing postural Hatha Yoga. Keep somatically processing and releasing your body's repository of past traumatic experiences (e.g., Bessel Van der Kolk). And if you aren't already, start also practicing tuning in to the most subtle nuances of your body's energetic reality. Build an accepting, curious, attentive, open-minded relationship with your felt-sense-experience and you'll unlock one of the greatest liberations one can experience: freedom from repeating the past.
Only you can take yourself from trauma to the bliss of prana. Practice wisely.
Support the Work
Relationship Yoga is a living offering. We share practices, guidance, and ceremony across communities because we believe relational healing is essential for collective evolution.
Much of this work — both within Relationship Yoga and across our broader projects devoted to raising consciousness — is offered freely. Behind what is visible is a great deal of unseen devotion: travel, production, ceremony support, community care, and creative labor that is often unpaid and self-funded.
Cory and Cass have invested deeply, financially and energetically, to support global initiatives, local communities, and accessible teachings.
If you feel resonance with this work and wish to support its growth — and the birthing of future offerings — your donation helps sustain not just this platform, but the wider ecosystem of consciousness-centered projects we are stewarding.
Your support makes accessibility possible. This is an invitation into reciprocity.
Thank you ꩜
